2013 Self Photography.

My heart/mind/soul needs a rehab. Don't worry oppa, I will stay away. 

My roommate has a mini photography studio set up for her assignment so I made good use of it. Make up by the roommate.

my baby.

"Wish you could take me away
Pretend that I am your baby"

in my head, you're already my sayang.

Oppa.

I feel like an inflated balloon filled with joy and love and I feel like I want to just fly away but I know if I flew to high the pressure up in the air is going to pop me.

I wrote more on the other blog. Please make me feel real again, oppa. 

pulsee baby pulse

i dont feel alive.

too much pretense of maturity and rationality.
i dont feel alive.

..
.....
..........

i need to feel alive.

..


im sinking into a state of depression.

DECORATE.

my favorite song from last last year. i used to listen this at least 20 times a day, on loop. omg such a good song, i dont feel the heartbreak as strongly as i first heard it in 2010, the memories are pretty faded and i have so much more better things to worry about now anyway, but i still cringe a little because its such a sad sad song.
















FAVORITES:


not just because shes obviously chinese malaysian, but this is very beautiful. i love how she says that Yuna calms her down, because SPM is near. haha so comel.



2 white girls, one piano and soothing harmonies.


her voice is too mainstream pop for this song but somehow it works with the new arrangement. it almost can be a power balad lol. and i love korean americans. AHAHAHAHA or i think they are korean americans, i've seen enough to identify them.. i thinkkkk xD



i dont know why i included their races in my description, this election day thing is getting to me..

#what

http://hashtag-coolstorybro.blogspot.com/



dont ask me why do i have so many blogs. I LIKE LA DIU.

EMO 2012.

sometimes in life we do dumb things, and right now, i am rethinking the dumb things i've done. i know they say the mistakes you did yesterday shaped the person you are today. its been 2 years, no, its been almost 3 years now. heard the house mate talking on the phone with her ji mui one day and she said something that sounds very very familiar, 'i dont miss him, because i dont love him anymore, but i miss the person i was when i was with him'. i like myself alot, the person i am now. 1 year in architecture school made me realize that i can do anything, literally. the things i can never picture myself doing, i can do now. thus, i have no fear for anything (maybe except being raped and killed) and i am very very prideful. reading my prof write on my grading sheet : 'you made me believe once again there are some people who are born to do this, real architecture'. when i got the grading sheet back i couldn't believe it, i at least read it for 10 times that day. and i cried. i cried because i know now what i am capable of when i put my mind to it, i know now theres no limits to my sky, i know because i am stronger. but there is a missing piece. i found myself stalking again (thanks to facebook timeline-- the real stalking device), i pulled the timeline down to 2009, there is only 1 status you posted :  EMO. that 3 letter word look so blunt and blatant now, now that i've announced myself as a person who look down on people who post emotional facebook status. but i know why, and i dont remember if you status then made any impact on me back then, but it definitely does now. every day i think whether you know i am very sorry for what i did, eventhough you told me over and over again you dont care anymore. 

下一个他,赶快出现吧.

if you feel what i think you feel about me, dont wait around anymore!